Thursday, March 26, 2009

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Life and Fog

Last week we had an extremely foggy day in Pittsburgh. Or, as Chloe likes to say...'poggy.' Anyway, on that particular morning I dropped Becca off at Kindergarten, and Chloe off to preschool. As I drove to the restaurant to do some work, I thought about how going through life is a lot like driving in the fog.

Let me explain.

I know my way to the restaurant like the back of my hand. It really didn't matter that it was foggy at all. My brain knew all the right turns to make. I didn't have to look for any signs or landmarks. I knew they were there before I even saw them. I think that's what it's like going through a comfortable stretch in your life. You just go on auto pilot. You know where you are. You go there every day. It is your every day.

But what if you want to go some place else? I am at a point in my life where I think I know where I want to go. I believe I know what I want. If I were driving in the fog, but wasn't driving my normal route, it would be a bit more challenging. I would have to look for signs and landmarks where I needed to turn. In life, sometimes I pass these signs up, and have to go around the long way. I don't have a map, but rather a general idea of where I'm going.

Maybe I need a map.

How about you? Do you know where you want to be? Are you in your same comfortable routine drive, but want to go someplace else? First off, you need to figure out where you're going. If you are driving around in the fog...no map...and no idea where your final destination is...you will just be driving around.

To be more specific, I know that I would like to make a living online. I have already started doing this (and will be creating a new blog soon about how I make money online), but I'm not making a living. I also want to push Downey's House a bit further. I'm a little more unsure of exactly what I want here. Will it be an additional location? Will it be another restaurant all together? Not sure. But that's after the online stuff.

I know that I want to spend time with my children. And I'm doing a pretty good job at that. I know that some day I want to have enough money to enjoy life a bit more. Travel some. Spend time with my husband.

So, what's the point? I guess it's this: I've made some goals and I'm working towards reaching them. But as I speak with friends and family, most are not quite sure where they're going. Pick some goals, dammit.

Wow, that was a lot of back and forth babbling. Well, I'm on vacation, and being on vacation means that I get to think about life and where I'm going. Don't worry. I'll be back to 'work' soon. And I'll stop being so....um.....'thinky.'

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Excuse me....

Just a quick note to say that I traveled with two small children yesterday. They were very well behaved, but it was a CONSTANT stream of questions. I had to have a glass of wine on the plane just to deal. So, I'm thinking of you...but I don't really have time to post right now. I'll try tonight. We're headed to Sanibel Island today to search for some shells.

BTW, the wine made it better. More later!

Sunday, March 22, 2009

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Thought Soup

I usually don't post a lot of 'techie' stuff on this blog. I'm considering starting another blog for this type of thing. But I DID want to at least mention it.

Let me back up, first. I started blogging as a way to get the word out about the t-shirts and gifts that I design for CafePress and Zazzle. That was almost two years ago. I really didn't know too much about blogging and such, so I jumped in with a free blogger account. I've been pretty happy with it.

But, once I opened the restaurant, I got a blog started over there. And I used Wordpress. I love it! It's on my own domain, and it's much easier to tweak things. I have since used Wordpress to set up an affiliate site or two. And I'm getting better at it! I've learned so much...how to install wordpress, playing with themes, and so on. I recently did two things with Wordpress, and they've made me very happy.

First, I actually PURCHASED a theme. I purchased the Flexx theme from iThemes. I love it! It's very easy to change the layout, colors and pics. Easy peasy. I also found a plug in for automatic updating. I loved it so much, I actually donated to the author (which is something I can't afford to do as much as I would like). Here's the link to the plug in.

Now, am I going to break up with blogger? Nah, I don't think so. It's worked for me so far, and I guess I'm sort of attached. I have, however, re-directed links to my own site. So, you can also find this stuff at http://blog.brainlint.net.

Just a little mention of regular life: The new menu starts at Downey's House on Tuesday, so I've been busy! I'm printing them up today. It's been a crazy couple of weeks trying to get the menu together, programming it into our POS system, and making sure we have all our i's and t's dotted and crossed. On top of it all, the girls and I are headed down to Florida on Wednesday. Packing? Haven't even really thought about it yet.

I also (finally) finished reading Dead Until Dark. I really, really enjoyed it...even though it took me much longer than it should have to read it. I bought the next 2 books to read while we're in Florida. Hopefully I get enough 'me' time when we're there. If you watched True Blood, the book and the show are pretty similar. But I was surprised that there wasn't any mention of Tara (the bartender). I'm not going to spoil anything for anybody, so I'll just say that there WERE differences in the book versus the series. But I think that both are very good.

OK, the girls are complaining that everything is 'Booooorrrrriiiiinnnnnnnggggg!' How about an exciting trip to Staples, girls? (OH, that makes me thing of a quick side note: I have always loved the smell of office supply stores. I'm strange. I love the smell of toner and paper. It makes me happy. We walked into Staples yesterday and Becca, with a smile on her face, said 'Mom, mmmmmmm...it smells GOOD in here! Poor thing.)

Wow...this post really did go just about everywhere. Like I've mentioned before, sometimes I just can't focus :) Have a great day!

Friday, March 20, 2009

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Decorating

Just wanted to let everybody know that I'm tweaking with the look of my blog.

In between laundry, cleaning, restaurant cr@p and drinking coffee.

It's not getting done all at once, but about 10 minutes at a time.

Bear with me :)

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

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Vinyl Sausage


We have this slide bouncer thing. It was a gift. And a darn good gift, at that. Today it was beautiful outside. So, I asked Chloe if she wanted to play on the 'bouncy slide.' Well, of course she did. This thing is actually pretty easy to put up. Roll it out, plug in the air compressor, tap a few stakes into the ground, and you're good to go.

She had a blast bouncing around on this all afternoon. When Becca got home from school, they were invited to a neighbor's house to play for a couple of hours in their back yard. Fine. 'Me' time is good. The homework got done, and off they went. I had the house to myself.

I also had to put that thing away.

By myself.

Thank God there wasn't some stray parent with a video camera taping their child outside. I had to look absolutely ridiculous. I started very calm and focused. I made sure the air was out. I start folding this thing up. Unfortunately, the size of the folded 'bouncy slide' was about twice as big as the bag I'm supposed to put it in. I unfolded. I folded again. I straddled this damn thing, shoving it into this bag. I was laying on the grass, holding the thing on top of me.

I was a mess.

But I got it in that damn bag.

Heather - 1
Bouncy Slide - 0

Take that, Little Tikes.

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Rats and Birthday Cake

I have very mixed feelings about Chuckie Cheese.

Strictly as an entrepreneur and business woman, I think it's great. There's always money in entertaining kids. Especially when it's mixed with giving parents a little break.

As a mom? That's where my mixed feelings come in. I don't really mind going to Chuckie Cheese during the week. In the afternoon. When other parents are at their regular jobs, and it's nice and slow. It's not a bad place when the weather is crappy and you have a bit of cabin fever. When it's slow. Every game is only 1 token. That's cool. And there are things that the kids can actually do on their own. Cool.

We had a bad experience with germs at Chuckie Cheese. A couple of years ago, everybody we know (including us) got sick after going to Chuckie Cheese. EVERYBODY. I blame it on the tube/slide. We all got a horrible stomach flu. Becca was 3. Chloe? 18 months. Becca got it first, and it plowed through the family. It was utterly and completely terrible. Becca was in the slide the day before she got sick. It was a Saturday. I have since found out that they clean that slide on Saturday nights (Well, at least at our Chuckie Cheese). We go early in the week now.

We also bring a VERY LARGE bottle of hand sanitizer. I am constantly putting it on their hands. When we get there (so we don't spread any germs we might already have). Before we eat. After we eat. When we're done playing. Again in the car. We haven't gotten sick since that one time. But I am VERY afraid to go there in the winter - the middle of sick season.

What motivated me to write this post? Well, let me tell ya. We went to a birthday party on Sunday at 'The Cheese.' It was at noon. The place was completely insane. We had to wait in line to even get in. It was the longest two hours of my life. There were screaming children everywhere. When we gathered for the 'birthday' part, we were jammed into a corner. We ate some cardboard pizza. The kids didn't want to sit. They wanted to play some more. It was loud. Very loud. It was a birthday party for a neighbor kid (who is very sweet, and a cutie!). But being in the middle of 8 different birthday parties all happening at the same time was just too much for me.

Sorry, kids. You're not having your party there.

I got home, popped two Advil and considered having an adult beverage. Some days, this motherhood gig just doesn't pay enough.

I was rejuvenated later in the evening, when Tony took the girls outside to play. Did I relax and give myself some 'me' time? Nah. I popped the MP3 player on, cleaned up the house and put away laundry (singing at the top of my lungs). All better. That's all I need. Just a half an hour of escape every day or two.

Monday, March 16, 2009

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Signs of a Broken Heart

First, let me say that I had a great weekend! The weather is starting to cooperate, we had great business at Downey's House, and I made it through a party at Chuckie Cheese yesterday. I'll complain more about Chuckie Cheese soon. But for now, I have this for you:

I'll bet you thought that title meant I was going to talk about love.

Wrong.

I received this email over the weekend. It talks about how a woman might feel if she were having a heart attack. I'm 38. There are people my age who have had heart attacks. So, I tucked this information into the filing cabinet in my brain. I hope you do, too. Here's the email:

FEMALE HEART ATTACKS


I was aware that female heart attacks are different, but this is the best
description I've ever read..

Women and heart attacks (Myocardial infarction). Did you know that women
rarely have the same dramatic symptoms that men have when experiencing heart
attack .. you know, the sudden stabbing pain in the chest, the cold sweat,
grabbing the chest & dropping to the floor that we see in the movies. Here
is the story of one woman's experience with a heart attack

'I had a heart attack at about 10 :3 0 PM with NO prior exertion, NO prior
emotional trauma that one would suspect might have brought it on. I was
sitting all snugly & warm on a cold evening, with my purring cat in my lap,
reading an interesting story my friend had sent me, and actually thinking, 'A-A-h, this is the life, all cozy and warm in my soft, cushy Lazy Boy with
my feet propped up.

A moment later, I felt that awful sensation of indigestion, when you've been
in a hurry and grabbed a bite of sandwich and washed it down with a dash of water, and that hurried bite seems to feel like you've swallowed a golf ball
going down the esophagus in slow motion and it is most uncomfortable. You realize you shouldn't have gulped it down so fast and needed to chew it more thoroughly and this time drink a glass of water to hasten its progress down to the stomach. This was my initial sensation---the only trouble was that I hadn't taken a bite of anything since about 5:00 p.m.
After it seemed to subside, the next sensation was like little squeezing
motions that seemed to be racing up my SPINE (hind-sight, it was probably my
aorta spasms), gaining speed as they continued racing up and under my
sternum (breast bone, where one presses rhythmically when administering
CPR).
This fascinating process continued on into my throat and branched out into both jaws. 'AHA!! NOW I stopped puzzling ab out what was happening -- we all have read and/or heard about pain in the jaws being one of the signals of an MI happening, haven't we? I said aloud to myself and the cat, Dear God, I
think I'm having a heart attack!

I lowered the foot rest dumping the cat from my lap, started to take a step and fell on the floor instead. I thought to myself, If this is a heart
attack, I shouldn't be walking into the next room where the phone is or
anywhere else ... but, on the other hand, if I don't, nobody will know that
I need help, and if I wait any longer I may not be able to get up in a
moment.

I pulled myself up with the arms of the chair, walked slowly into the next room and dialed the Paramedics ... I told her I thought I was having a heart
attack due to the pressure building under the sternum and radiating into my jaws. I didn't feel hysterical or afraid, just stating the facts.. She said
she was sending the Paramedics over immediately, asked if the front door was
near to me, and if so, to un-bolt the door and then lie down on the floor
where they could see me when they came in.

I unlocked the door and then laid down on the floor as instructed and lost
consciousness, as I don't remember the medics coming in, their examination,
lifting me onto a gurney or getting me into their ambulance, or hearing the
call they made to St. Jude ER on the way, but I did briefly awaken when we
arrived and saw that the radiologist was already there in his surgical blues
and cap, helping the medics pull my stretcher out of the ambulance. He was
bending over me asking questions (probably something like 'Have you taken
any medications?') but I couldn't make my mind interpret what he was saying,
or form an answer, and nodded off again, not waking up until the
Cardiologist and partner had already threaded the teeny angiogram balloon
up my femoral artery into the aorta and into my heart where they installed 2
side by side stints to hold open my right coronary artery.

I know it sounds like all my thinking and actions at home must have taken at
least 20-30 minutes before calling the paramedics, but actually it took
perhaps 4-5 minutes before the call, and both the fire station and St. Jude
are only minutes away from my home, and my Cardiologist was already to go to
the OR in his scrubs and get going on restarting my heart (which had stopped
somewhere between my arrival and the procedure) and installing the stints..

Why have I written all of this to you with so much detail? Because I want
all of you who are so important in my life to know what I learned first
hand.

1. Be aware that something very different is happening in your body, not the
usual men's symptoms but inexplicable things happening (until my sternum and
jaws got into the act). It is said that many more women than men die of
their first (and last) MI because they didn't know they were having one and
commonly mistake it as indigestion, take some Maalox or other anti-heartburn
preparation and go to bed, hoping they'll feel better in the morning when
they wake up ... which doesn't happen. My female friends, your symptoms might not
be exactly like mine, so I advise you to call the Paramedics if ANYTHING is
unpleasantly happening that you've not felt before. It is better to have a
'false alarm' visitation than to risk your life guessing what it might be!

2. Note that I said 'Call the Paramedics .' And if you can take an
aspirin. Ladies, TIME IS OF THE ESSENCE!

Do NOT try to drive yourself to the ER - you are a hazard to others on the
road.

Do NOT have your panicked husband who will be speeding and looking anxiously at what's happening with you instead of the road.

Do NOT call your doctor -- he doesn't know where you live and if it's at
night you won't reach him anyway, and if it's daytime, his assistants (or
answering ser vice) will tell you to call the Paramedics. He doesn't carry
the equipment in his car that you need to be saved! The Paramedics do,
principally OXYGEN that you need ASAP. Your Dr will be notified later.

3. Don't assume it couldn't be a heart attack because you have a normal
cholesterol count.. Research has discovered that a cholesterol elevated
reading is rarely the cause of an MI (unless it's unbelievably high and/or
accompanied by high blood pressure). MIs are usually caused by long-term
stress and inflammation in the body, which dumps all sorts of deadly hormonesinto your system to sludge things up in there.

Pain in the jaw can wake you from a sound sleep.

Let's be careful and be aware. The more we know the better chance we could
survive.

A cardiologist says if everyone who gets this mail sends it to 10 people,
you can be sure that we'll save at least one life.


**Please be a true friend and send this article to all your friends (male &
female) you care about!**


And just as I was typing this, Chloe woke up, came downstairs and started playing a game. I guess she learned a new word. As she was playing she said "Dammit! I almost got the blue one." Yeah, I've gotta go and deal with that.

Saturday, March 14, 2009

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Happy Steak and BJ Day

Yup, that's what today is. Steak and BJ day. You can learn more about it at their website www.steakandbjday.com/ To sum it up, it's the male version of Valentine's Day.

Here in Pittsburgh, it also happens to be Parade Day. This is the day, in the past (and I'm stressing IN THE PAST, because it's different now), that I would find my husband the most inebriated. He's Irish. Plain and simple. They would start with beer and donuts at 8:00, head to the parade, then take the bus back into Carnegie. Carnegie was a mecca for Parade Day Partiers. Lots of bars, one of them being an Irish Pub. And we lived in Carnegie. It was the perfect storm.

Me? I've never been to the parade. I'm not much for a) being out in the cold - and it's usually cold on parade day and b) large crowds of drunken people. I just don't have the patience.

So, Steak and BJ day combined with Parade Day? That's drinking, hanging out with buddies, steak and a blow job. That's the perfect day for most guys I know. Now my guy? He won't be going to the parade this year. He'll be working at Downey's House, keeping the fun going. He will get to hang out with his buddies a bit, but he won't be drinking. As for the steak and BJ? He might eat a steak at the restaurant.

But he doesn't get home until 4:00 in the morning. That's when I'm sleeping.

Sorry, babe.

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UGH, Pittsburgh Weather, Why Do You Torture Me?

It's March in Pittsburgh. March in Pittsburgh is very bi-polar. You have your good days. Last Saturday, it was warm (70 degrees), sunny and just a little breezy. Perfect. This morning it was 26 degrees. Now, it is supposed to go up to 50 degrees today. But, like my father who lives in Florida says, "50 is a 'down to' number. Not an 'up to' number." As you probably know by now, I'm really not a snow girl. I honestly believe that I was born in the wrong place. Don't get me wrong - I LOVE Pittsburgh. The people, the buildings, the architecture, the spirit. But the weather? It sucks. I got to thinking about where I would move to (dreaming, really...I don't think we'd move until we're old and gray). One of the options my brain came up with was Arizona. Hurricaines? No. Earthquakes? No. Tornadoes? No. Blizzards? No. The only thing that my folks say about Florida is that it's sometimes like soup walking out the door - super humid. Not so in Arizona, my friend. I think Arizona is my new fantasy place. So, just to push the fantasy a little further (and aid in my Law of Attraction visualization-thingie), I found this website: SFP and did some poking around. This is the house I'd like to have. And that is the house that I will visualize when I dream of moving some place with perfect weather. But this is more around what I could afford. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

But if I'm dreaming, I'm dreaming big!

So, if you see me IRL (in real life, that is) and I'm staring off into the distance with a glazed look in my eyes, I'm probably thinking about myself in the warm weather, enjoying my new home.

Just leave me alone to enjoy it.

Friday, March 13, 2009

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Show Me The Money

You know, the past year has been crazy for us...especially financially.

It all worked out OK in our heads. Tony will quit his job, we'll still have one more paycheck on its way. We'll turn the restaurant around in 2 weeks (which we did!), open up and get right back into making money. We tapped ourselves out in order to get the money to purchase the restaurant. A second mortgage, emptying out the 401K, plus another small loan got us our money to purchase Downey's House.

There were a few things that we didn't really factor in. Like new signs. And deposits for the utility companies. And, oh yeah. The first food order. Most of these things ended up on our personal credit cards. Some of that stuff is still on there. Plus, we really had to live off credit cards for about a month. But hey, you've got to take a risk to get where you want to go sometimes.

Well, I've decided that I need to get that credit card stuff in order. I have amounts on four different cards, just sort of floating around. So, I went to this site I heard about, and you can get instant approval credit cards right online. It's nice to see all of the different deals, right there on one site. Me, I'm a fan of zero percent interest. I don't need a lot of bells and whistles like cash back or airline miles. I'm gonna get all of this in order - and paid off (hopefully) quickly. The restaurant has been doing well, and Tony is happier than a fat kid in the Twinkie factory.

So, now that it's been almost 1 year, I'm feeling settled. Not so crazy and scattered. And I'm takin' care of business.

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You: The Peeping Tom Seeing My Morning

I don't really know if my family and friends know what happens during a typical Heather morning. I can't imagine that they do know. So, just in case anybody cares (and to make myself feel a little better), here's how my morning went. Today was an easy one, because we didn't have to leave the house at all. Well, just a quick run to the bus stop. So, here it goes:

  • 4:30 am - Wake up to see 3 year old in front of my face, asking for milk. Realize that I'm in Becca's bed, and fell asleep around 9:15.
  • 5:00 am - Think that it's a good idea to wake up and get some stuff done. And I actually wake up.
  • 5:00-5:45 - Spend some quality time with the husband, who has not gone to bed yet. He also thinks that it is currently still THURSDAY. I continue to correct him, telling him that it's FRIDAY.
  • 5:45-6:00 - Watch 15 minutes of the news. Wish I looked as good as Sonni Abatta.
  • 6:00-6:25 - Watch 'The Office.' Laugh. It was a good one.
  • 6:25-7:00 - Make large pot of coffee. Check e-mail. Log in the numbers from the restaurant last night. Prepare deposit. Figure out the change order. Update our POS system for Friday specials.
  • 7:00-7:05 - Drink more coffee. Smoke another cigarette
  • 7:05-7:06 - Start vacuuming a plethora of nerds candy from the family room. Realize that it's 7:06, and decide I need to shower
  • 7:06 - 7:35 - Wake Becca. Iron her outfit. Wake her again. Brush teeth, shower, greet crazy-haired Chloe, help Becca into her tights and dress. Come downstairs. Finish vacuuming aforementioned nerds.
  • 7:36 - Yell upstairs for everybody to hurry - we have 19 minutes
  • 7:36-7:55 - Pack a lunch, make a waffle, drink more coffee, have a smoke, find missing glove for Becca, brush Becca's hair, grab almost-forgotten library book for Becca. Pack one pretty-looking sweetheart and one bed-head, pajama-clad, slipper-wearing sweetheart into car for 1 block ride to bus stop (it was cold!)
  • 8:05-8:10 - Turn show on for Chloe, sit down to write blog post for Downey's House
  • 8:10-8:11 - Get Chloe a banana
  • 8:11-8:30 - Finish blog post, check some forums and twitter. See that CafePress is down. Complain about it on twitter
  • 8:30-8:31 - Put another television show on for Chloe
  • 8:31-8:45 - Hang out with Chloe, tickling her until she begs me to stop
  • 8:45-9:05 - Finish up with checking sales and stats online. Look up code numbers for the liquor I'm about to order
  • 9:05-9:06 - Get Chloe some strawberries
  • 9:06-9:15 - Order the liquor, enter amount into Quickbooks
  • 9:15-9:45 - Help Chloe make Kool-Aid for her 'Lemonade Stand.' A lemonade stand where there are two customers: Me and a small stuffed bear. Play lemonade stand.
  • 9:45-9:55 - Start dusting and cleaning the glass in the family room. Decide I'm not in the mood to really do much more cleaning right now.
  • 9:55-10:05 - Spend 10 minutes searching for a copy of our new menu that Tony wrote revisions on. Finally give up, and hope I remember the revisions.
  • 10:05-10:10 - Take phone call from the restaurant
  • 10:10-10:11 - Start menu revisions
  • 10:11-10:12 - Cut up an apple for Chloe
  • 10:12-10:20 - Work on the revisions some more
  • 10:20-10:22 - Help Chloe in the potty
  • 10:22-10:30 - Finish with the revisions. Hope I got them all.
  • 10:30-10:33 - Re-wash the laundry I left in the washing machine overnight. Freshen up clothes in dryer
  • 10:33-11:00 - Print up a copy of the fixed menu. Remember that I also need employment apps printed up. Do that. Deal with my desktop and what my security scan found.
  • 11:00-11:20 - Fold the laundry with Chloe. Yes, it takes that long.
  • 11:20-11:23 - Sit down to sign our corporate tax returns
  • 11:23-11:24 - Get Chloe some carrots
  • 11:24-11:30 - Decide to boil some eggs. Smoke a cigarette
  • 11:30-11:45 - Fart around on the internet. Still annoyed that CafePress is farked up.
  • 11:45-11:50 - Sew up the back of Chloe's Build-A-Bear
  • 11:50-12:00 - Get the eggs from the stove. Decide to write this post.
  • 12:00-12:03 - Make toast for Chloe
  • 12:03-12:10 - Continue with post
  • 12:10-12:11 - Get a hard boiled egg for Chloe
  • 12:11-12:16 - Continue with post
  • 12:16-12:17 - Make witty remark on Twitter. Well, I thought it was witty
  • 12:17-12:20 - More blog post
  • 12:20-12:22 - Get Chloe some Kool-Aid
  • 12:22-12:30 (now) more blog post.
So, there's my morning so far. The thrilling life of a work-at-home-business-owner-mom. You know, throughout this time line, there's the conversations I have with Chloe. Well, they're not really conversations. It's more like a question and answer period. That lasts, um, all day. These kinds of mornings are actually my favorite. I get some business stuff accomplished, get some housework (sort of) accomplished, I get to be social with my online friends, and I get to hang out with my Chloe.

Now, I'm gonna go and make myself some egg salad. I did sneak a granola bar in sometime around 8:00. But I'm hungry!

Want to follow me on twitter? I'm at twitter.com/hdowney

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

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One Child? You Have No Idea!

I had a conversation with my nephew this weekend. Mind you, my nephew is 30 years old. He is married with a two year old son. He and his wife are wondering when to have that second one. Personally, I enjoyed having mine so close together. But hey, I'm just saying what worked for me.

Then we started talking about how different it is having TWO kids. I can only imagine how difficult it is to have MORE than two, but I'm gonna stick with what I know. I'm hoping that I didn't scare them. I didn't mean to be negative at all!!! I was simply stating how MY life changed. But anyway, I told them that the transition going from 1 child to 2 children was much more difficult than going from zero kids to 1 kid. And my friends tend to agree, so I felt comfortable saying this.

When you're having your first child, the only time you're sacrificing is your own. When child number two rolls around, the juggling begins. My girls are exactly 2 years apart. Two year olds don't really understand the whole 'taking care of the baby' thing. Not for more than five minutes, anyway.

There's the emotional part of trying to be even with each child. When they get older there's the fighting.

Yup, lots of fighting.

My girls DO get along. But there's always the fighting, too. I'm constantly breaking up arguments. Reasoning with one or the other. Or trying, anyway. I don't think you're really knee deep in parenting unless you're breaking up fights.

Don't get me wrong, there are other challenges with just one child. Challenges that I don't really want, either. When you have only one child, YOU are the playmate. When I tell my kids to go play a game, they go play a game. I only need to give them some guidance. I don't have to be an actual player. Sometimes I do play games with them, but at least there's an option. Plus, I play by the rules, and that must not be cool with 3 and 5 year olds. They make up their own rules.

So, I say yes to nephew. Have that other child. I say have it soon. Because even though the work increases exponentially, so does the good stuff like kisses, hugs, and cuddles.

Sunday, March 8, 2009

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My Difference? My Personalities All Know Each Other.

United States of Tara on Showtime


As you might know, I'm not a huge tv girl. There are a few shows that I will record on the DVR and watch when I get time. But Tony and I do have a Sunday night ritual. It's been going on for years. Back when Sex And The City was on HBO, we started watching shows together on Sunday nights. Sex And The City was obviously my find, but I think Tony actually enjoyed watching it. Or maybe it was Oz. We've been through The Sopranos, Six Feet Under, and Deadwood. Sometimes we watch Entourage, too. But most times that's when we sit at the kitchen table and chat.

But anyway, back to the original reason for this post. I really like the newest show I've found...The United States of Tara. This is the first Showtime series we've really gotten into. We've only had Showtime for a year or so. And honestly, I was about to cut back on the cable. And, cue Murphy's Law. That's exactly when I found this show. Nothing against Showtime, but we just don't watch that much television.

This show just cracks me up. But it's serious, too. In a nutshell, it's about a woman who has multiple personalities. She has decided to go off her medication and just take one day at a time. She (and her husband) want to figure out WHY these personalities are coming out. It has John Corbett as the husband, and I just like him. Ever since Northern Exposure. Now if you haven't watched the show, don't read the next paragraph.

SPOILER: When Tony and I saw the writing on the mural a few weeks ago, I nailed it. "There's another personality." I said matter-of-factly. I can't wait to find out more about the peeing red poncho gremlin! ::END SPOILER:

I think that we all have multiple personalities. I have mommy-me, wife-me, bar owner-me, I'm just meeting you, so I'm going to be really fake-me, and on and on. But I realize that I have these personalities. And I can pick and choose them as I wish. So, I'm looking forward to our Sunday night tv time tonight! If you haven't seen the show, watch it! Grab it on On Demand, go to a friend's house with Showtime...whatever. And I think that True Blood is coming back on HBO some time late summer. I've started reading the first book that this series is based on. Maybe I can read the next one before the series starts up again!

Anything's better than Spongebob, Baby Looney Tunes and Scooby Doo. Although, I have to admit...Phineas and Ferb is pretty funny.



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My Love/Hate Relationship with Fitty

Well, I finally got back into my exercise routine on the Wii. When I turned it on and saw Fitty, he not-so-politely reminded me. "Did you know it's been 10 days since you last checked in?" Um, yeah. I know. Bite me.

I was about 10 minutes in (did some yoga and strength), and the telephone rang. Needless to say, I got a little distracted and didn't quite finish. But I don't feel completely bad. I've found that there are some really cheap Nintendo Wii games out there. I bought one with some family games...and I can't remember the name of it off hand. But it has lawn darts, bocci ball, basketball and some other games. It was only about twenty bucks, and the games are easy enough for the little ones to play around with.

Unsupervised.

Which is fantastic. I think it was the best twenty bucks I've spent in a while. I can't believe that I'm going to say type this, but I'm really glad we bought the system (and the board). I get double alone time. Well, sort of. I'm sort of alone when I'm using the Wii Fit. And when the kids are playing (again, unsupervised), I get some more time. I'll just have to be nice to my spending cash and pace myself on picking up some new games.

As as for Fitty? I'll see you tomorrow, ya bastard.

Saturday, March 7, 2009

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What a Difference a Day and 30 Degrees make!

Wow. If you read my last post, you know that the kids and I were having a rough and crabby day. One day and some warmer weather later, we were three happy chicks. After school, we ran to our corner convenience store, got some treats, and went to the neighbor's to play outside. (Well, I didn't play...but I did drink some caffeine). Fighting? None. Happiness and togetherness? Lots. Bedtime went smoothly, no crying and whining.

Same thing today. The girls got to play outside at a family birthday party. They really do need to burn off some energy (and cabin fever). Aside from a huge knee scrape (and a big hole in some tights), there were no major incidents today. All is good again in Downey-ville.

We did have a little funny tonight with Chloe. As I was making some scrambled eggs for Becca (and talking on the phone at the same time), Chloe walked up behind me. I was at the stove, and the carton of eggs were behind me at our island. Chloe loves eggs. Hard boiled eggs. You see where this is going, right? As my back is to her, Chloe grabs an egg...tightly...in her hand. I hear screaming, and turn around to see egg goo on the floor and one very confused three year old. It was a mix of terror and confusion. This is exactly what I saw above her head:

I felt bad (a little) laughing out loud. But I just couldn't help it. So, now my two little angels are sleeping quietly. And I have this quiet house to myself. I just enjoy the peace so much. So much that I stay up much later than I should. Especially today, when we lose an hour of sleep. So, short post just to let everybody know that we're back to our happy selves. Maybe I'll post something more meaningful and/or entertaining next time!!

Friday, March 6, 2009

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Not a Typical Day (Hopefully)

Let me tell you about yesterday. There's lots to tell. This is becoming a typical day, but I'm hoping that warmer weather will make it better.

I'll start at the beginning. Thursday. We all wake up and get ready. Chloe doesn't want to go to preschool. That happens about half the time. I bribe her with a promise to stop at Starbucks and get her some vanilla milk. Fine. OK - we all have everything (although I didn't eat breakfast - normal). I get Becca to school, get to the Starbucks drive thru, and get 2 vanilla milks (I promised Becca that she could have one when she got home) and a big honkin' iced caramel macchiato (sp?) for myself . Yum. Chloe was just sort of blah. But the sun was shining, it was getting warmer, and all was good. As I take Chloe to school, I see that her eyes are watering and she's sniffling a bit. No fever, though. I warn her teacher and tell her to call if she gets any worse.

So, off to the bar. Payroll day. I do my office work there, get payroll done, and have no major happenings at the restaurant. I have just enough time to get the birthday presents for this weekend and next weekend, plus stop at the dollar store for some gift wrap and bags (BTW - this is the best place for gift bags). All is good. Sun still shining. I pick Chloe up from school, and she has a fever. But she's a trooper. She's not a whiner. She informs me when she feels bad, takes her medicine, and that's about it.

***Let me interject a little ditty about how we've been feeling lately. We're all a little bit on edge. I think we ALL have a big case of cabin fever. There haven't been many chances to play outside for the kids. I'm completely DONE with winter. I need it to be 70 degrees. And sunny. Now. This has been going on for about a week, and we (meaning me and the girls) are driving each other crazy. Little things will set Becca off. Chloe just wants to watch television. I feel like a drill sergeant - except for the fact that my 'troops' aren't doing a very good job of obeying orders. Plus, I haven't exercised all week...and I've fallen back into my bad sleeping habit, which consists of me falling asleep with the kids and then waking up at 1:00 in the morning. Then I don't make it back to bed until about 3:00. OK, interjection over**********

At this point of the day, I'm in a fine mood. I clean up the house a bit, eat a little lunch and get ready for my debut at Kindergarten. Today is the first day I am helping Becca's teacher with their computer class. Off I go, driving in the sunshine. When I get to class, Becca is happy to see me, and the other children were very curious - but nice. I chat a bit with her teacher and we head off to the computer lab. Each child has their own computer. Becca's teacher shows them what to do on a projection screen (they're typing a sentence that they wrote earlier, using Word. They'll also add a piece of clip art, but the adults will do that). It was a great experience! It was a bit crazy...18 5 and 6 year olds, each at their own computer, and each needing some help. I couldn't imagine Becca's teacher controlling that class on her own. I could never, ever teach kindergarten. But it was good, and I get to do it for 2 more weeks. I sneak Becca out of school about 15 minutes early, and we head home.

Then it starts.

It happens every day after school. Becca comes home, says hello, and then the evil is released. My theory is that she holds in all of this bad behavior while she's at school. And she's not a bad kid. But 8 hours of holding in ANY bad behavior can be tough. So she lets it all out. I usually give her at least a half an hour to just 'de-stress.' But during that half an hour she fights with her sister, whines about stuff, and is just crabby. Earlier that morning we had devised a plan for the evening. I told them that if Becca did her homework right after school, we would have an early dinner and bath, and then play a new game I bought for the Wii. After 20 minutes of bickering with Becca to start her homework, I had to turn into 'Mean Mom.' First, I threatened no Wii. Didn't matter. I yelled. She cried. I hugged her and explained that she wouldn't want to go to school the next day without her homework done. She cried some more. Ugh. We finally get the homework done - but it took twice as long. While Becca was doing her homework, Chloe fell asleep on the couch. It was quiet...on to dinner.

We had all agreed upon spaghetti (shock!! We agreed!). I cook, Becca chats with me. I'm dishing the spaghetti into bowls, and I ask Becca whether or not she wants sauce. She's just recently started eating pasta with sauce, but still sometimes likes just butter. She wants to taste a little, so I slide my bowl of spaghetti with sauce over to her. I get her a small fork full, and she tastes it. And then proceeds to spit it back in the bowl. And then spit some more. More like drool. Lots of drool. Right into my bowl. I take a nutty. 'Why would you do that!?!? What makes you think that it's OK to spit a bunch of spit into my dinner?!?!?' She cries. I throw my dinner in the trash.

She chooses butter.

I eat the left overs.

I'm just crabby at this point. But, I tell them to just give me five minutes to get happy. Bath time goes much more smoothly. We start playing with the Wii, and everybody's happy. They're doing well. They're actually enjoying playing lawn darts, and getting pretty good. Then it happens. Chloe gets a little too close to the table (of course, I kept telling them to stay in one place-away from the table) and smacks her hand off the table. Tears. I console. In the middle of all this, Becca keeps on playing. She accidentally hits the power button on the remote. Well, not really accidentally. She just feels the need to press all of the buttons. After I told her which buttons to press. I announce that we're done with the Wii for the night. Becca cries. Chloe is still crying. Well, while you're already crying and miserable - we may as well have you take your medicine. Because that makes you whiney and miserable, too. (Becca has started taking Zantac - in the liquid form. I'll admit, it's gross)

FINALLY, it's time for bed. We all love each other again. We cuddle. I smell their sweet hair. Chloe does a good job of letting me out of the room before she falls asleep, so I go and cuddle with Becca as Chloe drifts off. We talk about how much we really do love each other. And that's OK if we get mad with each other sometimes. We talk about our upcoming trip to Florida. We'll swim. It will be warm. Becca drifts off to sleep....and I do, too.

At 12:30 I wake up, decide to watch The Office and 30 Rock from the DVR, clean up a bit, and head back to bed.

What a day.

I wonder what life will be like when I have two teenagers. Then I decide it's best not to think about that now. We'll cross that bridge when we come to it. I'm wondering if I'LL be the one who needs medication when we get to that bridge.

Monday, March 2, 2009

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I Got My Roller Boogie On!

What a fun day I had with the family yesterday!!! Sundays have become our 'family day,' and we've been trying to do some different activities. Three weeks ago, it was the museum. Last week we stopped at the North Park Clubhouse in Robinson (meh.), and yesterday we went....wait for it....roller skating.

When I thought of going roller skating, I wasn't sure about the whole idea. I mean, the kids are only three and five, and they've NEVER been on a pair of skates. Ever. When I mentioned it to them, they seemed very excited about skating. They had even recently watched an episode of Ni Hao Kai-Lan where one of the characters learned to roller skate. So, the decision was made. Tony was up for it, and I was in charge of the details. But where to skate? Roller skating isn't really the most popular activity right now. There's a roller rink in Bridgeville...but they don't rent skates, and I think that they're only open on Friday nights. Then I remembered it....the place I used to go when I was young. I wondered if it was still open. I did a quick search online, and yes, the Neville Island Roller Rink was still open. My mind swam in a sea of pre-adolescence, bell bottom pants and Mork and Mindy suspenders (yes, I had a pair. Or maybe they were my brother's. But I very much remember them)



So, off we went. As we pulled up to the building, it looked just how I remembered it. Tony was a little surprised. 'This is it?!?,' he said. Yuppers, this is it. As walked through the door, it was like stepping foot right into the late 70's and early 80's. EVERYTHING looked the same. Everything. The orange paint. The yellow/gold shag carpet on the wall (well, there wasn't too much of the SHAG quality left). We walk over to rent the skates. And yes, they MUST be the same rental skates. I, of course, had graduated to my own pair of skates when I was young. They were blue. With red and white stripes on the side. Very patriotic. I think they were from Sears.

So, we all get our skates on, and the girls hare hanging on for dear life. I got quite an ab workout. Holding up a 40 pound child with one arm while on skates works your abs. Trust me. The girls went around once or twice, falling quite often. We stopped to get a drink, and I just had to do it. I had to fly around like I used to (or at least try). So, I head out by myself, and it was just awesome fun.

The girls got better as we went along. Chloe pretty much just stood still and let us pull her. Becca started moving her feet a bit, and gained some more confidence. They're not ready to go on their own quite yet, but they do want to go back again.

And so do I. A lot. It's kind of scary.